Propose? My knee hurts, will you just marry me already?!

When you are a Punjabi girl and reach “marriageable age” you find out about relatives you didn’t know existed, they pop out of nowhere to play matchmaker. Suddenly everybody knows someone who has an aunt who knows someone who has a nephew who would be “absolutely perfect” for you! Continue reading Propose? My knee hurts, will you just marry me already?!

Please to buy my amazing product, please?

Here’s a collection of the funniest sales pitches I have heard in the last 7 months. I swear I didn’t make any of this up!

#1
Sales guy: Hello, I am Jack from XYZ Consultation Corporation Limited.
Me:Hi, nice to meet you. So what can we do for you Jack? Continue reading Please to buy my amazing product, please?

Whats’ with all these apostrophe’s man?! This suck’s.

English is a strange, strange language. And when you are Indian and speak three other languages, it’s even worse. Many people I know get their apostrophes wrong. So once and for all, this is how you use them! Continue reading Whats’ with all these apostrophe’s man?! This suck’s.

Here son, let me show you how it’s done

If you live in Chennai and haven’t taken a share auto ride, you haven’t lived in Chennai. They’re one of the most convenient and cheap modes of transport although sometimes you’ll have half your butt in the air. But it’s better than taking a bus in the city during peak hours, unless you like being stuffed up somebody’s armpit. Continue reading Here son, let me show you how it’s done

3 Good Magic Movies That Aren’t Harry Potter

What’s the oldest story you can think of? Grimm’s Fairy Tales, the story of Ahalya turning to stone, Pegasus? It seems the possibility of transcending the realm of reality captivates the human mind, regardless of age.

Even though they may not be classified under Magic, how does one explain the shoemaker’s elves, the hibernating sleeping beauty, the mysterious land of Lilliput, the house made of candy, the box of evil, the ogre in the forest, the pirates terrified of mermaids?

Over the last few years, Harry Potter has redefined magic, magicians, witches and wizards. Enthralling as these books/movies might be, here’s a list of three other fantastic magic movies you should watch. Continue reading 3 Good Magic Movies That Aren’t Harry Potter

How To Make Fresh Grape Juice Without A Juicer

Cooking fresh meals is one of my biggest problems. I imagine it’s yours too. See, I don’t hire a maid or a cook, so most of our meals have some form of readymade ingredient.

We kid ourselves with “homemade pasta sauce” made with canned tomatoes and processed cheese, “homemade tortilla wraps” from Nuts & Spices where the only fresh ingredient is the lonely vegetable. I did make my own salsa sauce from scratch though and it was pretty darn good if I may say so myself!

In an effort to make something truly fresh, I attempted fruit juice. Can’t get fresher than that, right?

Problem: I don’t own a juicer.
Solution: Improvise. Continue reading How To Make Fresh Grape Juice Without A Juicer

This Street Cat Loves Cheese

This street cat saunters into my apartment every now and then, to have his ears scratched and eat my cheese.

He’s so used to being fed mutton biriyani and chicken roast by the neighbours, he turns his nose up at anything I offer His Highness. Except scrambled egg and little bits of cheese! Aren’t cats supposed to be lactose intolerant? He loves cheese this fellow does.

He’s also the laziest cat I have ever seen. A mouse could play hopscotch on his head and he wouldn’t stir. ‘Eh, can’t be bothered. The lady on the third floor is making fish curry today, I’ll go get my cute on.’

He’s also called the King of Golden Nuggets. 

Here are 10 people foods that cats can actually eat.

Here’s a list of things you shouldn’t feed cats, including milk. Surprise surprise.